Maz zwraca sie do zony:
- Kochanie, przyniesiesz mi herbate?
?ona (zalotnie):
- A czarodziejskie slowo?
Maz:
- Biegiem!
Ojciec oglada zeszycik synka:
- Czemu, kurteczka, tak nierowno literki piszesz?!
- To nie literki tatulu, to nuty.
Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they agree to hold a contest with God as the judge. They set themselves before their computers and begin. They type furiously for several hours lines of code streaming up the screen. Seconds before the end of the competition a bolt of lightning strikes taking out the electricity. Moments later the power is restored and God announces that the contest is over. He asks Satan to show what he has come up with. Satan is visibly upset and cries I have nothing! I lost it all when the power went out. Very well then says God let us see if Jesus fared any better. Jesus enters a command and the screen comes to life in vivid display the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers. Satan is astonished. He stutters But how! I lost everything yet his program is intact! How did he do it?!
God chuckles Jesus saves!
Hrabia kapie sie w morzu. W pewnym momecie zaatakowal go rekin. Krzyczy wiec do wiernego slugi:
- Janie, podaj noz!
- Jan z oburzeniem:
- Panie Hrabio, z nozm do ryby?!!!
Dwoch zawianych facetow idzie ulica. Nagle jeden z nich pyta sie tego drugiego:
- Ty, a wlasciwie to gdzie ty mieszkasz?
Drugi odpowiada: Widzisz tamten blok pomalowany na brazowo?
- Tak.
- A widzisz tam na piatym pietrze, co sie pali swiatlo?
- Tak.
- To jest moje mieszkanie. A widzisz ta blondyne tam na balkonie? Ta z duzym cycem?
- Tak.
- To moja zona. Widzisz tego faceta, co ja od tylu bierze?
- Tak.
- To ja.